There is a war

There is a war I fight with myself almost everyday. Some days are better than others and then again some days I feel like everything is broken and my fault. Days go by and sometimes even weeks and it feels like my world feels like its shaking and then it starts shattering and I'm sitting there and sometimes under it as it all crashes down upon me and around me. I do not know what causes it. My wife always comes to calm me down and sometimes it's like I'm wrapped in my thoughts and my emotions to even notice she's there trying to guide me as she tries to tell me its all okay. She watches me fall but she tries to catch me even  though she's trying to build herself back she'll destroy herself so we can fix each other and grow. She's been by my side through everything and she has not once left me she stayed through it all. She's my light through this war and shes my everything. She picks me up when I need it the most and I love her for it just like she loves me for me.

Love

When you love someone and they love you the same if not way more, its hard to see them hurt. I know this because I see my wife hurt everyday for a month since our son was born and I cry every night and pray that she will get better.  I haven't left her side and she still is having trouble to this day.

Building Anger

Have you ever felt anger build and not know why? It happens quickly but explodes everything around you. I've been dealing with this for a very long time. I hid it for years and finally it all blew up and out. Tearing me down from the inside out and my family along with it. My wife stands by my side helping to fight it back but theirs only so much pain she can take.